vxxen's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My third entry of Thanksgiving. .. i am bored and restless and i m thinking about doing my tai-chi now. to get my mind set straight then maybe i'll go to bed early. i got work tomorrow. i have a gut feeling that i passed my 60 wpm! i hope i do because that means that i will be in the next class which is the 60-90 class. but, i'll be leaving my friends. i'm gonna miss my friends :( oh well. the sooner i get out and graduate, the sooner i make that money and get that penthouse apartment i want lmao. and a big long (grrrrr!) for george. i'm trying not to text him and stuff. i was thinking about unblocking the kuzmanovski family. . . . then i was like, 'anaaah' aintnobody wanna start that shit off again. and linda says that it's not that i'm being a punk, but what is right for me. that sentence alone has changed most of my outlook on life. and i kinda like it. sometimes i wanna shake george! cuz we established that we like each other. and then. . he does nothing about it. doesnt ask me out on a date, or to hang out. . nothing. i mean. what the fuck? do u need a memo? a letter? a 20 piece high school band ensemble to the toon of 'if u liked it then u shoulda put a ring on it?!" awww come on man! grrr. i like things the way i want them. and when i want them, i get them. no matter what the cost. and if it takes too long my patience will only go so far. after that, i make shit happen faster. 0:) i've had a crush on u for four years, george! wake up and smell the puerto rican! <-- that last sentence sounds a little. . white-girlish. it sounds like i've been waiting for him for four years. i have and then i havent. i talked to him for about 3 years. he was in boot camp, and training then off to iraq. i sent him a care package. i dont remember gettin a thank you. cuz i damn sure woulda remembered that. i've had 2 boyfriends in between still talking to him. but i had to hide it away from carlos cuz that bastard could *smell* me talking to another boy. which he was kinda right cuz my booty call and i (i've 'hung out' with him since i was 18 so about 5 years at the time.) would hang out when ever i was sometimes in queens and he wuld come and get me lol i was gangsta lol i miss those times. but at the same time i think he was cheating on me too. and i know who it was too, but it's over and i'm glad i did what i wanted to do. lol then andre ::shudders:: ew. lol he served his purpose for a while and i'm glad that i can say his name or think about him without gettin upset . . ( HOW COOL AM I?! GANNNNGSTAAAA! lol ) ::sighs:: i just want someone i like , to talk to every once and a while. whenever i'm bored. oh, well. i know deep down inside that we could never work, so why put all these emotions and energy into something i have doubts about and kinda have a feeling that would never work? we come from 2 different worlds. have 2 different. . idk. but whats underneath all the sexual attraction we have? we got jokes. respect for each other. . . wow. i think that's about it. and thats pretty sad. :( and i know eventually he's gonna fuck up again and i'm gonna be pissed off and highly upset, while he isn't. he's like a venus fly trap. once u get sucked in, ur dead. it was wierd. when we werent talking cuz i was pissed off at him for a bout a month or two. i was pretty contented. no emotions. no nothing. sure, i missed texting him, but i kept myself busy. and that what i need to do. keep myself busy.
�unknown �Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it�s better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together.� �unknown �The loss of love is not nearly as painful as our resistance to accepting it is.� �Tigress Luv
�M. Kathleen Casey 10:50 p.m. - November 25, 2010 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||
|
||||||