vxxen's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- gettin better eh. i'm doing a million things at once and starting none at all. i should be practicing my steno and not on fb and not listenin to my itunes and not playin my psp and all this other shit. i guess im just frustrated from not doing nothing and everything. i cant wait to get rid of this cane so i can walk on my own. shit aint funny anymore. i dont have many friends to hang out with so i'm a little lonely. but, i keep saying to myself when i get money i can buy friends ( i know that's an old cliche and everything but it helps me sleep at night lol ) i went to a bbq last weekend with my old friend dave. he's got a gf that i really dont care for from the get go. but whatever. i told her straight up that i dont want him, nor do i have any feelings for that boy. she was like, 'Oh I never gave it any thought." yeah. ok bitch. but i think she hates me cuz all she talks about is marriage, and babies and babies and marriage. and in front of dave's mom i was like, "can u stop saying that? it makes everybody uncomfortable." she looked at me like, "oh, shit. i cant believe u said that." yeahhhhh, i kinda did. i asked if she was mad at me like 45 minutes later. cuz i could feel her anger and shit and i'm very intuitive. if you're feeling a certain way, i feel it. i feel what u feel for about 3 seconds and thats when i know. so naturally she said yes and she also said that i embarrassed her. Bitch. u embarrassed yourself. u aint got a pot to pee in and u want a kid? YA'LL NIGGAS BROKE UP! how the fuck can u think about kids and marriage now?! dumb bitch. yeah. not feeling her at all. but i gotta play nice cuz dave is a mad cool guy and the kid saved me from a looot of shit. no joke, that nigga protected me and gave me a place to bunk for a couple of hours. so, he's my boy for life. ::sighs:: how do i get myself into thses messes? my problem is i say what i feel and that gets me in trouble sometimes but the worse part is ..... I don't care. and that is no bueno. lol but i dont care lol there was a whole bunch of dudes there that were is friends. rob was thre (oh, joy. not) and i acted like everthing was cool. cuz i'm a grown ass woman. so, we slept together a couple years back. oh well. shit. keep it moving. this one dude is gayer that a 3 dollar bill. he kept asking me ALLLLLL night if i thought he was hot. i was like, 'No, nigga. ya not. you are the most self- centered little boy i have every met in my entire life and u need some self-confidence, cuz if u gotta ask a hot girl (me) if u think u cute or not, you got serious problems and u need to grow the hell up. . . pass the bacardi?" everybody was like oh shit. that nigga had his mouth all open like he was catching flies lmao shit. then he was like, ( to recover) oh you're jsut saying that. i know u think that i'm hot." ugh. whatver nigga. i was sassy the whooooole night. then i realized that niggas like sassy bitches. when i realized that i was like, 'oh, shit. now they gonna like me. ugh." Sure enough, it happened. niggas tried to lean in close and shit. dude, its the bacardi talking. chill. but, i had a cool time. i looove being a sassy chick makes me smile lmao. i feel a little bit better and should get back to studying. oh! noe more thing. Quin called me today and i was rather shocked i mean we always text each other and shit and he said that no matter what that he's gonna hang out with me ( he has a crush on me i know that ) and im not playing around with him nor do i like him like that, i just miss chillen with him and everything we had jokes together. he's puerto rican /german (hairy ass fucker lol) and 'm puerto rican/black. and we both got gangsta mothers so we got a lot in common. i dont talk about andre, i dont mention andre, i dont wanna know about andre. i mean, i do and i dont. but im too proud and shit to ask about that faggot. that means that he's won and i've lost to much fr that dip shit to win. I *HATE* to lose. i alomst never lose and im not starting now. fuck him. ok. feeling much better now. gonna listen to music and play god of war and homework and go back on fb. not in that order tho lol duecez! ~VxXen 11:40 p.m. - August 20, 2010 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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