vxxen's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Holy SHIT, where the FUCK am I?!

im feeling really bad right now. im always upset, i dont wanna do shit. im not laughin anymore, i dont wanna make desserts anymore( and i LOVE cooking!) i sleep late, i always feeling like crying. its gettin on my fucken nerves! i hate feelin like this! i gotta go to court at the end of the month. the day before thanksgiving i gotta get my paperwork in order. and i cant feelin like this when im sitting in that courtroom. (maybe it would be go for my case lmao) i dont even know what to do..this shit is gettin on my nerves! my mom is tellin me to fight this. and i can say that im really not tryin to. wanting to try is hard! man, i dont know what to do. and the vitamins aint even working. they giving me shitty shits! o my god! it looks like im going to have to pay outta pocket. them shit run at least $200 a pop. im gonna have to do it. good lord. i feel like crying just by speaking..thats some serious shit. its so bad, i dont even want to make this public...
i gotta go to the vitamin doc tomorrow, maybe he can help me out...

8:24 pm... i pushed myself and made BROWNIES! :-D i feel a little better now. i made bronwies, im watching survivor, im with my sister and moms. whenever im with momma dukes, i feel comfortable and less nervous and "down" you know? ok. ima try and make my bracelet now maybe that will make me feel an ounce better lol! DUECES! LOL